Most of you know, we are very excited to be unexpectedly blessed with a child, a child we never thought would be a part of our lives. Most of you also know, we were not holding our breath for a bundle of joy.
I know I will love my child, and I will love being a mom. I also (out of a bit of guilt) am worried as I write this, I do not want my future little babe to be worried they were some kind of mistake when they are old enough to read this. But I know I can't be the only woman on the planet that has been shocked by this kind of news, so here we go...
This past May, I realized over a glass of chilled bubbly Prosecco, that it had been quite some time since I had been visited by Aunt Flow. This is not uncommon in my world, so I didn't put too much stock into the fluttering thought. About a week later, still no period, I decided to take a pregnancy test, it was a Friday.
Peed on the stick. waited. not pregnant.
I thought, well duh, of course I am not pregnant. So I slide into the weekend with a Kentucky Derby Bridal Shower on the horizon, and indulged in my perfectly independent life. My hubby was away with work, so I sipped bubbly through the week, still not getting my period, and I found myself on Thursday repeating a pregnancy test.
Peed on the stick. waited. not pregnant.
So I hopped in the shower, chatted with a co-worker, and for some reason I had a pit in my stomach to pull that pee stick out of the trash. There it was, just one faint little line. I just about died! How many times have I taken this very same test and never expected to see these results!
I needed indefinite proof! No lines, no messing around, no uncertainty! I ran to the local drug store and grabbed an electronic test promising very "easy to read" results. Arriving home I couldn't rip my pants off fast enough.
Peed on the stick. waited. PREGNANT.
In all capital bold clear as day letters!
My heart sank, mostly with joy, but also with a lot of fear.... what the....
I immediately texted my husband, waiting for him to surely call frantically and rush to the same crazy extremes I was: how? when? what are we going to do?
Shockingly, no response, another text to him. Still no response. Finally a "why are you not freaking out, call me now," did the trick.
He called, with cocktails in his voice, "hey baby, what's up?"
"What's up????? Didn't you get my text?"
"Yeah, I got it, but you're not really pregnant right?"
"No this is for real, this is happening!!!"
Hindsight, telling my husband he will be a father over the phone, probably not my best moment, but a girl can panic right?
He rushed off the phone to get back to his work dinner, with a text a few hours later with how excited he was.
And the adventure begins.... as I wrap up this post (which I started months ago, the exhaustion is real), I look back at those first moments as a mom, and I know I am still just as scared, and just as excited. I must really think that planned, unplanned, this is such a blessing, and we can't wait for our lives to never be the same!
Stay tuned for pregnancy updates, and so much more.
~ No matter our path in life, dress fabulous and let's practice some social graces.
Amanda xoxo
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